But more than that, my mind has been wondering a lot lately about her birth mother. On this day, 2 years ago, she gave birth to this precious girl. She has to remember that. How could this date not go by without her wondering about the sweet baby girl she chose to give up? People have often asked me, "What kind of mother would leave her child for someone to find?", or "Is there something wrong with her that the mother didn't want her?". I've stopped and thought a lot about who this woman must be.....maybe she is young and unmarried, maybe she is older and not well, maybe she already has other children and simply did not have the means to raise another child or very possibly she was forced into giving her up simply because she's a girl. China has been under a one child law since 1970. Naturally, families want boys for work and a means of social security for the parents since they are so poor. Because of that reason alone, tons of baby girls have been given up over the years.
For me, giving up my children would absolutely be the last resort. I would have to have tried every way possible to make it work. I would do without for myself or possibly kill someone first if I thought I had to leave them for someone else to find and hope that they would care for them. Unlike America, China has few options for mothers when it comes to their children's welfare. There aren't Chinese families lined up on a waiting list to adopt them at birth, there is no government welfare and most families do not have the resources to pay the hefty fine they are charged if they have more than one child. The irony is, you are not allowed more than one child or there are consequences and it's illegal to abandon children although the orphanages are full and no one is in jail for abandonment. Boys are revered and girls are considered "no good". I could go on and on about China's history and the terrible things that go on. I believe abandonment is a woman's "birth plan" in China. Sure, there are terrible things that go on in America and other countries as well. But I know without a doubt God led us to China, not anywhere else.
I wonder if her birth mother is a Christian. Maybe she prayed for a godly family to raise her daughter. Maybe she's a prostitute. We will never know. But I believe with all my heart she has stopped and thought about her baby girl on this day and wonders about her. Could she ever forget her sweet face? Could she ever forget the sound of her cry when she was born? Did it take all the courage she could muster to leave her? Did she stand close by to make sure she was taken to safety? When I take myself through these emotions I realize the kind of mother who would abandon her child. That kind of mother would be me. That kind of mother would most likely be you. If it was absolutely impossible to raise a baby, would you want a better life for her? I feel abandonment is probably the most courageous thing this mother could do for this child. God had a plan for Maggie long before her birth mother did. Kevin said in an earlier post that she was created to be our daughter. Although she was created in the womb of a different woman, she was created for our family. If I ever had the opportunity to say anything to her birth mother it would be to thank her for giving her life. To thank her for being brave enough to leave her in order that Maggie may have a better life. I would want her to know how very much she will be loved and she will be afforded all the opportunities that children deserve. I would tell her our story of how God put all of this together for such a time is this.
Happy Birthday my Asian angel. Your family loves you and is waiting for you!
"Can a mother forget the baby at her breast and have no compassion on the child she has borne? Though she may forget, I will not forget you!" Isaiah 49:15
For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother's womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well. My frame was not hidden from you when I was made in the secret place. When I was woven together in the depths of the earth, your eyes saw my unformed body. All the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be. Psalm 139:13-16
"....I tell you the truth, whatever you have done for the least of these, you have done for me."
Matthew 25:40
